"Can my baby get some crackers?"

Why?  Please tell me why your baby is here, screaming, in the first place?  I understand spanking is no longer a "good" parenting technique, but I would like to know what happened to the word 'no'?  Just because your child cannot sit still and you do not want to take responsibility and entertain them, or pay for a babysitter, does not mean I am now in charge of supplying entertainment for them.  Just because you are tipping me, doesn't mean I am your babysitter. 
Maybe you had not noticed, probably because you don't pay attention to anything, like your screaming child, but servers have to clean up after your family.  I don't care that your child likes crackers, all I care about is the fact that I have to spend the next two hours sweeping up every piece of those smashed crackers.  If you didn't know, cracker crumbs get into every crevice, in every place, and carpet? You try and sweep cracker crumbs out of carpet.  Exactly.  That $5 tip doesn't even being to cover the work I now have to put forth.
Although, I guess I would rather just give your child the crackers than have you sit there while your children run laps around the restaraunt.  Yes, this is not an exaggeration.  This one woman, who still comes into the restaurant would sit at her booth, pull out her laptop, and precede to forget she was a mother.  Her three early childhood/ pre-pubescent minion-like children would then run, and when I say run, I mean relay race sprint, around the entire restaurant.  One day, when I went to turn the corner, arms full with dirty dishes, I yelled "Corner!" [for non-servers this is what you did to avoid running into each other], and then was tackled by this little, blonde brat.  No apology. Nothing.  The child got up and continued to run.  The mother you ask?  Zero acknowledgement for what had just transpired.  But of course, at my restaurant this behavior, although not acceptable, is still observed and allowed to occur on at least a weekly basis. 
So, note to parents:  If you don't want to watch your children and entertain them, do not bring them to a restaurant.  Maybe Chuck-E-Cheese, but that covers about all your options.  If you can't behave them, leave them home.  Can't afford a babysitter?  Then you shouldn't even consider eating out in the first place.