Why? Please tell me why your baby is here, screaming, in the first place? I understand spanking is no longer a "good" parenting technique, but I would like to know what happened to the word 'no'? Just because your child cannot sit still and you do not want to take responsibility and entertain them, or pay for a babysitter, does not mean I am now in charge of supplying entertainment for them. Just because you are tipping me, doesn't mean I am your babysitter.
Maybe you had not noticed, probably because you don't pay attention to anything, like your screaming child, but servers have to clean up after your family. I don't care that your child likes crackers, all I care about is the fact that I have to spend the next two hours sweeping up every piece of those smashed crackers. If you didn't know, cracker crumbs get into every crevice, in every place, and carpet? You try and sweep cracker crumbs out of carpet. Exactly. That $5 tip doesn't even being to cover the work I now have to put forth.
Although, I guess I would rather just give your child the crackers than have you sit there while your children run laps around the restaraunt. Yes, this is not an exaggeration. This one woman, who still comes into the restaurant would sit at her booth, pull out her laptop, and precede to forget she was a mother. Her three early childhood/ pre-pubescent minion-like children would then run, and when I say run, I mean relay race sprint, around the entire restaurant. One day, when I went to turn the corner, arms full with dirty dishes, I yelled "Corner!" [for non-servers this is what you did to avoid running into each other], and then was tackled by this little, blonde brat. No apology. Nothing. The child got up and continued to run. The mother you ask? Zero acknowledgement for what had just transpired. But of course, at my restaurant this behavior, although not acceptable, is still observed and allowed to occur on at least a weekly basis.
So, note to parents: If you don't want to watch your children and entertain them, do not bring them to a restaurant. Maybe Chuck-E-Cheese, but that covers about all your options. If you can't behave them, leave them home. Can't afford a babysitter? Then you shouldn't even consider eating out in the first place.
Saturday, April 23, 2011
Thursday, April 21, 2011
"Um, Excuse Me Miss..."
Yes, you have my attention. I will listen if you can speak to me as if I am a human being; however, the minute you cross that line and get my attention in an unsuitable manner, I will turn on you. Do not expect me to respond if you even consider:
1. Snapping at me. I am not a dog. I see you.
2. Interrupt me while I am at another table. Do you see me? Did you mean to interrupt me? Now I think you are ignorant and inconsiderate.
3. Raise your hand, and I don’t mean in the way where you just let me know I’m needed when I get a chance. No I mean do not sit there and raise your hand high in the air, reaching as high as you can, holding it up with another arm, snickering along with the other people at your table. Now you are just belittling me and I intend to stand there until you stop.
4. Yelling at me, especially when I am not your server. If I am not your server, it is not my fault you didn’t get the ranch you asked for. I would have happily gotten a ranch for you, but now that you have thrown a fit, I think I will take my sweet time.
5. Holding your glass out in the aisle. I’ll take a detour and come back around in a few minutes.
I’m an attentive server. I recognize your needs and want to take care of you since you pay my bills; however, do not take advantage of that. I do not want your money enough that I am willing to be disrespected. If I am doing a bad job, do not be rude, simply reflect my performance in your tip [which should always be a minimum 10%, but we will get there later].
So then you may ask, “How do I get your attention if I need something?” That is simple. Ask for what you need when I am there or, simply smile and look my direction, I’m not dense, and I will get the hint. If neither of those work, it is likely because I am busy…maybe that is why I am running around, breaking a small sweat. If this is the case, please be patient or find someone else who is not as busy and POLITELY ask them to help you.
Next time you say the words “um, excuse me miss,” it would be great if you could also include a please and thank you.
1. Snapping at me. I am not a dog. I see you.
2. Interrupt me while I am at another table. Do you see me? Did you mean to interrupt me? Now I think you are ignorant and inconsiderate.
3. Raise your hand, and I don’t mean in the way where you just let me know I’m needed when I get a chance. No I mean do not sit there and raise your hand high in the air, reaching as high as you can, holding it up with another arm, snickering along with the other people at your table. Now you are just belittling me and I intend to stand there until you stop.
4. Yelling at me, especially when I am not your server. If I am not your server, it is not my fault you didn’t get the ranch you asked for. I would have happily gotten a ranch for you, but now that you have thrown a fit, I think I will take my sweet time.
5. Holding your glass out in the aisle. I’ll take a detour and come back around in a few minutes.
I’m an attentive server. I recognize your needs and want to take care of you since you pay my bills; however, do not take advantage of that. I do not want your money enough that I am willing to be disrespected. If I am doing a bad job, do not be rude, simply reflect my performance in your tip [which should always be a minimum 10%, but we will get there later].
So then you may ask, “How do I get your attention if I need something?” That is simple. Ask for what you need when I am there or, simply smile and look my direction, I’m not dense, and I will get the hint. If neither of those work, it is likely because I am busy…maybe that is why I am running around, breaking a small sweat. If this is the case, please be patient or find someone else who is not as busy and POLITELY ask them to help you.
Next time you say the words “um, excuse me miss,” it would be great if you could also include a please and thank you.
"Well the Menu Says..."
Let me just tell you right now, it doesn't. The menu doesn't say, bread included, or bread would be on your plate now wouldn't it? Still, you would think I had absolutely no idea what the menu says because I get this question at least once a night.
My favorite occurence of this was one evening, a father at a table of four ordered a pasta dish with bruschetta on top. Now folks, bruschetta is a blend of diced tomatoes and basil that is often placed upon toast and consumed as an appetizer. For this entree, the tomato blend is rather placed on top of the pasta, 86 toast. [For the non-server community 86 is a term servers use to remove something from an entree] However, this table was under the impression that bruschetta was toast, and upon not recieving their 'toast' with their meal, proceeded to argue with me that toast was included in their meal.
Now here is where the table really went wrong: "Well the menu says bruschetta is included". STOP. Rewind. Would you like me to not only tell you verbatim what the menu says, but also tell you what other entrees are listed on that page, what they each include, list all of our side items from memory, and then tell you exactly how your order is made, from morning prep to it being brought out of the kitchen? Because I can. I know you may think I am unintelligent because I am only a server, but I have worked here for two and a half years, been asked every question in the book, and worked preparing the food in the kitchen. I am pretty sure I know what I am talking about, yet this family was positive I didn't.
First, I informed them bruschetta was the tomato blend on top of their pasta, so they had received their bruschetta. Second, I retrieved a menu, pointed to the item in the menu [and here comes my favorite part], where it did not in fact state that toast was included in their meal. But of course, my restaurant's policy is the customer is always right and "Every Guest Leaves Happy", so, after proving my point, I walk to the back, get them their basket of toast that they so desperately needed, and apologize for the confusion, maybe I should clarify next time.
My favorite occurence of this was one evening, a father at a table of four ordered a pasta dish with bruschetta on top. Now folks, bruschetta is a blend of diced tomatoes and basil that is often placed upon toast and consumed as an appetizer. For this entree, the tomato blend is rather placed on top of the pasta, 86 toast. [For the non-server community 86 is a term servers use to remove something from an entree] However, this table was under the impression that bruschetta was toast, and upon not recieving their 'toast' with their meal, proceeded to argue with me that toast was included in their meal.
Now here is where the table really went wrong: "Well the menu says bruschetta is included". STOP. Rewind. Would you like me to not only tell you verbatim what the menu says, but also tell you what other entrees are listed on that page, what they each include, list all of our side items from memory, and then tell you exactly how your order is made, from morning prep to it being brought out of the kitchen? Because I can. I know you may think I am unintelligent because I am only a server, but I have worked here for two and a half years, been asked every question in the book, and worked preparing the food in the kitchen. I am pretty sure I know what I am talking about, yet this family was positive I didn't.
First, I informed them bruschetta was the tomato blend on top of their pasta, so they had received their bruschetta. Second, I retrieved a menu, pointed to the item in the menu [and here comes my favorite part], where it did not in fact state that toast was included in their meal. But of course, my restaurant's policy is the customer is always right and "Every Guest Leaves Happy", so, after proving my point, I walk to the back, get them their basket of toast that they so desperately needed, and apologize for the confusion, maybe I should clarify next time.
Disclaimer
The purpose of this blog is not to take into consideration the feelings and beliefs of others. The purpose of this blog is to state the truths about serving, in a hopefully somewhat humorous way, without regard as to how it makes others feel. Therefore, I am sorry if I hurt your feelings, or if you are one of 'those' customers of whom I describe, but maybe my advice will be beneficial. Maybe you hadn't realized you were wrong, but in my experience I have found, the customer is hardly ever right.
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